Now, I’m fully aware that this is purely a blog, not some sort of self-help domain or a forum for religious discussion. (I’m Jewish, so I’ve already got the minority complex on my side, but don’t worry — that’s besides the point.) Obviously a vast majority of my friends are Christian, and that’s something I’ve become as comfortable with as Easter eggs and Christmas trees. All of that said, I want to share an experience I had a couple of weeks ago in Charleston.

My diet consists of Red Bull shots, green tea antioxidant supplements and banana popsicles. My day planner is about to fucking explode with all of the shit I have written in it. My most recent trip to Wal-Mart resulted in a $40 purchase of anti-wrinkle moisturizer, nail polish, more sharpie pens so I can write even more shit in my day planner and various forms of caffeine.